The Truth Behind Si's Murder

THE TRUTH BEHIND SI'S MURDER
by Morwenna Paiko, special correspondant

On page 370, Jedi Master Si Dan died of lightsaber wounds inflicted by a Sith identified as Gnawthrul Haniri. The stunned survivors of the brutal attack were Kian Shekk (age 16), Kazadan Sarsis (age 45) and two droids known as R1-16 and GRR. The four spent several hours recovering at a nearby space station. During this time, reporters from the CaC2 Star Herald were able to collect statements and make their own conclusions about the death of the great Jedi Master.

According to the the witnesses, Si’s death was something that neither side of the conflict foresaw.

BUT WAS IT???

Startling new evidence suggests otherwise.

“Gnawthrul rammed into us,” said Sarsis at a recent press conference. “We were pinned down. The Sith boarded the ship through a hole he created and went on to attack Kian.”

Sarsis’ statement has some gaping holes in it (pun intended). If Haniri broke the side of the ship, all the passengers would have been sucked out into space and imploded beneath the pressure. If that didn’t kill them, they would have suffocated.

Everything that Sarsis said was a lie. A coverup.

It seems like Shekk, R1-16, GRR and Sarsis have something to hide. Is it possible that they could have had some part in the death of Si Dan?

When confronted with this question, Sarsis grew noticeably angry. “No comment.”

Kian Shekk, another one of the survivors, grew violent when accused. “YOU--YOU--YOU YOU’RE NOTHING BUT A FLEA FROM KORRIBAN!” Shekk told reporters. He proceeded to insult them and smash the furniture in the room. “YOU THINK I MURDERED HIM??? HOW COULD YOU--YOU--YOU INSIGNIFICANT RANCOR FLEA!!! HE WAS MY FRIEND - MY ALLY - HOW COULD YOU THINK THAT?” At this point, Shekk grabbed our hapless reporter by the throat and threw him across the room. Shekk then panicked, broke down the door and ran out into the street.

Guilty conscience?

Intrigued, the Star Herald made further inquiries. As Shekk, Sarsis and the droids were unavailable to comment, reporters visited the home of Gnawthrul Haniri. It was a surprisingly pleasant place with flowers and a nicely-mown lawn. Haniri consented to an interview after receiving several hefty bribes.

“I only came for the Padawan,” said Haniri. “I was supposed to bring him back to Inir. But that crazy Jedi got in the way. I would have killed him much quicker if that little droid hadn’t seized the ship’s controls and started making us rock back and forth.”

This corroborates Sarsis’ recount of the battle. According to him, R1-16 began to shake the ship “in an attempt to disorient Haniri.” However, this also disoriented Si and indirectly resulted in his death.

“Kian and I attempted to stop the bleeding,” Sarsis recounted. “I know a bit about first aid, but not nearly enough to treat those sort of lightsaber wounds.”

Again, this statement defies common sense. Even the simplest of Younglings can tell you that lightsaber wounds don’t draw blood.

So what really happened? Reading between the lines and making a few educated guesses, the CaC2 Star Herald is able to speculate upon the actual events that led to the demise of Si Dan. He was MURDERED by his own comrades!

But what would motivate them to do such a thing? After all, Si was such a nice guy!

Kian Shekk, one of the perpetrators of the murder, has been universally acknowledged as uncontrollable. Following the death of his Master, close friends noted a dramatic change in his character. In the days that continued, Shekk was conflicted with his loyalty to the Light Side of the force and tried to flee from the Temple. He was apprehended by Si Dan and placed under house arrest in the Infirmary.

Shekk appears to have nursed a grudge after the incident. Just a few days after being imprisoned in the Temple Infirmary, Kian jumped out a window in a desperate attempt to escape. Fortunately, something was there to catch him.

“One moment mesa be goin’ on drive, then this bombad Jedi fall from the sky and land on mesa speeder,” reported a Gungan, who is currently suing the Jedi Council for damages. “Hesa start laughing and hittin’ mesa ‘round the head. Mesa panicked and nearly fell off mesa speeder. Sometimes mesa still have nightmares.”

After this hasty checkout from the Infirmary, Shekk joined up with Kazadan and Si, no doubt intending to get revenge for Si’s attempt to control him.

But what would motivate Kazadan Sarsis to murder Master Dan? We at the CaC2 Star Herald have formulated our own theories. After “fighting side by side” for over twenty years, Sarsis must have grown weary of living in Si’s shadow. It was always amicable Si who received the awards, the honor, the glory. It seems that Sarsis finally snapped. Consumed by jealousy, he joined the uncontrollable Shekk on his quest for revenge.

It would be all too easy to convince R1-16 to join the plot. All the two Jedi would have to do is offer him some sprinkley donuts. Droids are notoriously easy to manipulate.

After deducing the motives of the perps, it is relatively easy to figure out the rest of the murder. Sarsis and Shekk must have lured the unsuspecting Si onto the ship and assaulted him when they were out of Tython. What could Si do against an uncontrollable Kian, jealousy-crazed Sarsis and hungry R1?

Gnawthrul Haniri was either framed or in on the joke. Perhaps the Jedi hired him to take the blame for Si’s death? Whatever the case, Haniri is innocent.

After brutally killing Si Dan, the Jedi set about destroying the evidence. Si’s body was burned in an empty lot, and his lightsaber given to Shekk as a trophy. GRR was threatened with instant death if he dared to speak of the events in the ship, and R1 was greatly rewarded.

It appears that the Jedi have gotten away clean with this cold-hearted act. We at the CaC2 Star Herald appeal to the Council to investigate this matter further.

Lylyss Silvertree

Blog Editor